Singapore

Anyone who has been to Singapore can't help but notice how clean the city is. It's the only city in the world where the mass transit system would pass a white glove inspection. Anyone who's been to Singapore also couldn't help but notice the rather imposing list of local laws that are posted spurradically throughout the city. In fact, the local merchants have cashed in on the sometimes strange laws with brightly colored T-shirts proclaiming Singapore a 'fine' city (pun intended) and the listing the various infractions and their montetary penalities:

Spitting in public: S$1,000

Picking widlflowers: S$500

Not flushing a public toilet: S$500

Importing Chewing Gum: S$10,000

Chewing gum in public: S$200

Durian fruit on the MRT- the subway: S$500 (Durian is a tropical fruit that allegedly is quite delicious, but has an awful stench from several yards away)

These are just a few of the more interesting ones. Oral sex is also illegal in the country, and people have been charged when an ex lover turned them in. The sentence for attempting to bring any drug into Singapore is death.

Punishment is doled out often by caning, where the prisoner is struck on the backside with a bamboo stick. Many of us remember the case of Michael Faye, the American boy who vandalized cars and stole street signs. He was caught, and received 13 strikes with a bamboo stick on his bare behind. The American government attempted to (somewhat) intercede, but the punishment was carried out. Ignorance is not an excuse in Singapore. Foreigners are subject to same laws as the locals.

There is also a law against feeding stray animals, which extends to wild birds. This story was told to me by an acquaintence. Unfortunately, I was not lucky enough to witness this one: One day, while my friend was walking down a sidewalk in Singapore an unmarked black van pulled off the road. A man in a military looking uniform got out holding an air rifle. Shocked, my friend stopped in his tracks as the man took aim and fired into the bushes several times. My friend asked what he was doing, and the man explained it was his job to 'eliminate crows'. With that, he got back in the van and went on his way.

My friend immediately came home, anxious to share this new found bit of Singaporean culture. We all got a good laugh and immediately dubbed this salient group of clandestine operatives the "CES" (Crow Elimination Squad).

Thus proving that Singapore is a 'FINE' city... just not for crows!