United Kingdom

Any visitor to London should indubitably stop for a mid morning tour of Trafalgar Square. Bring a bag of crisps and a camera and you'll have one of the most unique photo opportunities in the world as you stand arms outstretched Mary Tyler Moore style beneath the statue of the famous Nelson's Column. Keep your mouth closed as hundreds, nay, THOUSANDS of pigeons swarm around you as if you were the Mary Poppins bird woman. Now permanent fixtures to the square, and perhaps it's main tourist attraction, the generally good natured pigeons come in any variety of colors and are all well fed from the offerings of the 'flocks' of tourists who come to visit them daily. Incidentally, initiatives to reduce the number of birds in the square have been met with fierce protest from both private citizens and animal rights groups.

Affectionately, or not, referred to by the locals as 'rats with wings', the pigeon population in London has been out of control for some time now in the city. Originally brought from their dwellings on the side of cliffs and domesticated for food, the pigeons have now officially joined the city populace. They can be seen resting on buildings and fences, wandering sidewalks for scraps, and apparently taking undue advantage of city services.

It is a well known fact for Londoners that their pigeons frequent the tubes. They can be seen casually walking in to cars, waiting patiently for their specific stop, and then departing at their allotted station. Unusual anomalies to this trend have been reported, such as pigeons who EVERY DAY catch the District Line at Edgeware Road and depart at Paddington. They were not, however, ever observed catching the train back.

The humans seem more entertained by the experience than the pigeons do, and everyone to witness a passenger pigeon has the same statement, "It was as if they knew exactly where they were going!"

And speaking of 'going', the migratory menaces are causing more trouble than simply upsetting some workers on their morning commute. According to The Independent, in 1998 the British government issued an unprecedented ban on handling or eating pigeons found within 10 miles of the Sellafield nuclear reprocessing plant because of fears that the pigeons were radioactive.

The notice was issued by the Ministry for Agriculture, Fisheries and Food, after batches of more than 150 culled local pigeons were found to have high levels of radiation contamination. The birds had been tested by British Nuclear Fuels (BNFL) scientists after suspicions by an inspector from the Royal Society for the Protection of Animals.

From one thing comes the other, and the excrement the pigeons are leaving in large amounts all over London is causing the city of London to become radioactive!

The poop may be harmful in and of itself though, without the help of man made nuclear waste. According to ornithologists, pigeon poop is the explanation behind the deformed feet of pigeons seen all over London's undergrounds. Their feces actually rots their feet. It is what scientists refer to as an 'evolutionary dead end'.

Thus proving, a pigeon may not be able to pay full fare, but they always leave a deposit!